Miles to Go Before I Sleep

My goal is to finish my third book this year. It is a biography of an entrepreneur who has had a number of businesses, all successful, and has just started a new venture at age 84! This guy has had some incredible adventures. I have been interviewing him for several months, taping his stories and am busy with the tedious work of transcribing them, phrase by phrase. I know there must be an easier way to do this, but it works for me. I can’t wait for you to read some of his stories!

I have several books lined up which I need to finish…”miles to go before I sleep”… therefore, I want to remain healthy enough, and have plenty of time to finish my work. I wish I had started sooner, but I didn’t know I had so many books in my head.

Well, it’s January, a new year, like a fresh clean page on which to write. This year I decided I didn’t want to make any resolutions…except one: to create a better lifestyle. This means looking for ways to eat better, incentives to exercise more, thus living healthier.

In order to exercise more, I enrolled in a Zumba class. If I can roll out of bed early enough to be at the 7:45 am class, It should be a fun experience. Hopefully, the Charley Horse I will experience after the first class won’t be too bad. I also am taking Tai Chi and learning how to coordinate the arm and leg movements, a Chinese ballet somewhat akin to patting your head and rubbing your stomach at the same time.

It should be an interesting year. What do you hope your year will be like?

Pay It Forward

I saw an interview of Chelsea Clinton last night on a new NBC program, “Rock Center.” She told how she has successfully avoided the limelight for so long but she is now back in the public eye. Chelsea’s grandmother passed away a few months ago, but she gave Chelsea one important lesson not long before she passed away. She said, “It’s not what has happened to you, but what you do with what has happened to you.” Her grandmother told her that she is Chelsea Clinton and it is time she used that name to help others. So now Chelsea has shed her desire for privacy and is bringing inspirational stories to the television program as a new reporter on Rock Center.

No matter what has happened to you, what hand you’re dealt, do something positive with it. Help someone else in that position. Be supportive. Be there for her or him. You’ve gone through it. You came out of it OK. Let them know, they can, too.

It is time to give back and Pay It Forward. Think of a way, this time of year, to give something to others: your time, a small gift, an offer to help, a letter by snail mail telling someone how much you love-appreciate-miss them-whatever. This is the season of giving. Give from your heart and you will benefit just as much as the other person.

 

Memories

All my family has gathered recently in Los Angeles. When you live so far away from family the family reunions become more and more precious as the years go by. Now that I began my memoir, I have delved into my memory to recall past family reunions.

When I was a child, we had a family circle. I thought everyone had one. Only later did I realize how rare this was. We met in a rented space somewhere in Manhattan, which was a central location for all the families, who mostly came from Brooklyn and the Bronx. When I see old Neil Simon movies, I recall what it was like when I was a young girl. Woodie Allen grew up not far from my childhood home in Brooklyn. How far we have all come.

At the family circle meetings, the older folks soon dispensed with “business,” the reading of the minutes and so on, and the cards came out. The pinochle games, the gin games began. The teenagers, of whom there were very few, disappeared as soon as they could. They didn’t want to be with the grown-ups. The young kids, of whom there also were few, chased each other up and down the halls, and played hide-and-go-seek. How precious was the time. How innocent we all were.

My grandfather was one of ten children, and most of them belonged to the family circle. Some had passed away earlier and I only knew them through the stories the elders would tell. However, I knew eight of them, and their children, my cousins. My mother was one of the oldest cousins, and the youngest were only three years older than me. I grew up knowing so many aunts and uncles, so many cousins. Nowadays, families live so far apart, that it’s almost impossible to know very many cousins.

This is why I so treasure the time we have together this Thanksgiving and give thanks for the time I can spend with all my family.

A Hurricane and a Flood

Our friend Buzz Singer, who lives in Bangkok, updated us on his situation there. Thankfully, he is safe, and his neighborhood is unaffected by all the flooding that hit Thailand.

This takes me back to October 29, 1989, when  Hurricane Hugo slammed into Charlotte, NC, where I was living at the time. I did not have electricity in my home for eight days. Everywhere trees were down, and some unlucky folks had trees or branches smash their cars or the roofs of their homes. Lawns were a mess, strewn with leaves, branches, or downed trees. I couldn’t leave my house because a fallen tree lay across the street, blocking the corner, and making it impossible to drive. For months afterward, I could hear the sound of buzz saws in the distance. Cut branches and tree limbs were piled at the curb and it took months for it all to be cleared away.

I had water (but not hot water) and telephone service, but that was about it. Cold cereal for breakfast with apple juice or water instead of milk, just doesn’t do it. No hot showers, just cold washcloths for bathing. Grocery store clerks were handling checkouts with little hand calculators and I could only buy canned and packaged goods. Junk food was available; meat, dairy, and frozen food was not. Two days after the hurricane hit, Ben and Jerry’s was giving away ice cream because they had no electricity. People were barbequing meat and chicken, and inviting neighbors to a feast because the food had defrosted and freezers were useless.

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A Life of Its Own

2011-barnes-nobleSometimes, there are twists and turns in life that come at a time when you least expect it. Last night, when I gave a talk at Barnes & Noble about my book, When Angels Call Your Name, I told how one of these wonderful happenings occurred. In the book, the story entitled The Day I Drowned, is about a guy named Roy. He drowned and was under water for twenty minutes and yet, lived to tell me about this terrible experience. Roy’s best friend, Mike saved his life. After I published my book, I sent a copy to Roy. He bought three more books and sent one to Mike’s mother. Unfortunately, Mike died at 49 from complications due to years of alcohol abuse. However, his sister wanted her children to know that their uncle Mike was more than just a drinker, that he once saved a man’s life. She ordered several books, one for her son, daughter and granddaughter.  “His life had a purpose,” she wrote to me in an email. You see, this story grew and took on a life of its own.

They Touched My Heart

Giving a Talk

On Tuesday evening, October 4th, I will be talking at Barnes & Noble (on 90th St. and Shea Blvd.) about my book, “When Angels Call Your Name.” I can’t wait to tell people about the touched-by-an-angel stories that are in the book. I’ll start by telling the audience how I gathered all these stories over a period of 15 years. When people learned that I was rather spiritual, someone now and then might confide, “You know, I’ve never told anyone about this, but a couple of years ago…” and they would begin to share a story of an amazing coincidence. I might have been a life-changing experience. By 2010 I had 45 inspirational stories and I selected 35 to be in the book. There is a story called “61 Pounds of Pure Chocolate”, how an encounter on a dark country road changed a woman’s life, and another story, “The Day I Drowned”, about a guy who was under water for at least 20 minutes and lived to tell about it. That last story continued beyond the pages of the book. It’s a story that touched my heart. It’s one thing to hear these beautiful stories, and another to write them down so I can share them with others. Since this book has been so well received, I am now actively seeking more touched-by-an-angel stories. If you know of someone who has one, please let me know. Email me at http://www.marilynfrazer@hotmail.com. And come to my talk at Barnes & Noble.

Two Weeks in Paradise

Morning in Chautauqua

I just returned from Chautauqua Institution, which is the closest thing to Utopia. No matter how one describes it, you have to see it for yourself. Once you do, you’ll fall in love with the place. It’s like going back to the 40′s and 50′s when no one locked their doors and kids could safely ride their bikes without a parent tagging behind. There are classes, lectures on timely subjects, and concerts every night. You can play golf, sit on the plaza and read a book. Sit on a bench and enjoy an ice cream cone while watching kids throw Frisbees.

What Would You Do If You Knew You Could Not Fail?

Several years ago I received a unique birthday present from my sister-in-law. It was a metal paperweight, 5″ long, an inch and a half wide, and a half inch deep. On it was written, “what would you attempt to do if you knew you could not fail?”

This was a powerful question. What would I do? I reflected a long time on this question. We did I worry so much about failure? I had so many what ifs’.

What if I fall flat on my face when I have to speak in front of the group?
What if I frame one of my paintings, place it in the exhibit and nobody buys it?
What if I write a book and nobody wants to read it?
What if…? What if…?

What if’s keep us from accomplishing more in our life.

So what if no one buys my painting. I did it! I created a painting! I entered an exhibit! And, who knows? Someone might just buy it!

And, if no one buys my book, at least I wrote one! I have told so many people, “You ought to write a book.” They always say they couldn’t do that, feeling it was too difficult a task to contemplate.

After contemplating the question, I decided to write the book. I had thought about it for a while, I had used the theme of the book, “Why do women ignore the warning signs that say…this guy’s not for you,” for the theme of my thesis in grad school. I began to expand on this idea. Pretty soon the book began to take shape. Slowly, I added stories from women I interviewed to the book. I was on a roll. Well,  I finished the book. I revised it so many times to improve it. I published it. I completed a difficult project! I accomplished something special.

The paperweight was always on my desk. My inspiration. Every once in a while I would look at it and realize the what if’s had held me back so many times. But, not this time!

The paperweight is in front of me as I write this. I plan to enter one of my paintings at an art show in November. I am now busy writing my third book. Thank you for that paperweight, Leah. I don’t have the fear of failure any more.